Language of inclusion

Leverage Language

We are all familiar in the home-based industry with the word leverage; it’s really the point of the business. Yet very few people, even the top earners, learn to leverage language. The problem most MLMers have that are making money is that they are making money!

It closes the mind and most top earners never consider what they may be leaving on the table.

I should know. I was like that.

The subconscious mind makes all the decisions, on this, there is no argument. Surprisingly, while there is no argument on this point very few people consider what a profound effect language has in our relationships with reps, customers, and prospects.

Psycho-therapists J. Mitchell Perry maintains and my experience validates that words are small objects that have a profound impact on objects they are directed towards… reps, prospects, and customers.


In studying Perry I discovered there are two modes of speech.

One is inclusion the other is exclusion.

Kids Include, Adults Don’t

Example: Ask a kid and the parents, who just walked out of Disney World, how it was and the kid’s response will probably be “It was great!”

Most parents would say, “It wasn’t bad at all. It wasn’t a crowded as I expected.” Or. “The prices were not to steep, really not a bad deal at all.”

The child’s language is the language of inclusion.

He is telling you what is while the parent is telling you what isn’t. The child’s language is constructive while the parent’s language is constraining.

Perry points out that most adults become habitual users of exclusion language, which is the vocabulary of doubt, absence, equivocation, and diminution.

I was stunned as I examined this further, because the language of exclusion creates hesitancy, anxiety, and fear, which we all know, is not good for prospects, reps we are trying to coach, or customers.

And I mean stunned.

Let’s face it, if we are going to make some money, we need to talk to people. This is a basic truth and a network marketing skill that is mandatory. But there is an additional skill that will separate us from frustration and that is our choice of words.

Sales and enrollments up 100%

Simply by examining everyday phrases that I used I was shocked to find out how much exclusionary language I used.   Remembering that the subconscious mind makes all the decisions, I quickly saw why I was not getting a higher percentage of enrollments for myself and for my teammates.

Could it be that simple?

Shocked at the number of exclusion-type statements

I listened to myself and others for about a week, (horrifying observations!) then simply changed the phrases I used all that time from exclusionary to inclusionary.

Enrollment doubled. Case Closed.

Someone asks, “How’s it going?”

Do you say, “I can’t complain.” Or do you say, “I feel good.”

When a rep says, “Can you do this for me?” Do you say, “No problem.” Or do you say, “It’s a pleasure.”

When we say “no problem,” we are putting a NO in the person’s ear and we are putting the word PROBLEM in their head. Remember the subconscious makes all the decisions.

We want them to say yes but we have put both the word “no” and the word “problem” into their subconscious about us or the business.

By constantly seeding our language with inclusionary statements even in non-business related situations, this becomes the ‘currency’ of dealing with us.   More people say yes more often to folks who exhibit ‘inclusionary’ language than ‘exclusionary language.

Most people say “no problem”…meaning we’ll do it …but is it exclusionary language.  The more inclusionary, the more people will feel included and, subconsciously, being included is what we all want… being excluded is what none of us want.

This may seem minor.

Winners use the language of inclusion and get more enrollments.

What is minor is the change that we need to make. What is major is the results that it yields.

Exclusion language, remember, creates hesitancy and anxiety because it’s based on, subconsciously, what isn’t, couldn’t, shouldn’t, can’t and won’t.

Exclusion LanguageInclusion Language
I can’t complain I feel good.
I can’t argue with that.I agree.
I couldn’t ask for more.I’m pleased
I don’t see why not.Let’s do it.
No problemIt’s a pleasure.
That’s not bad.That’s good.
That’s not what I am saying.Here’s what I’m saying.

The Language of Inclusion

W. Clement Stone, the man who made Napoleon Hill rich and “Think and Grow Rich” famous, preached that it was little hinges that swung open big doors. Because these tiny changes in vocabulary have an enormous impact on the subconscious mind of the people you are trying to influence, the extended benefit is they’ll have an equally enormous impact on you.



People want to be a part of something bigger …feeling included is bigger.   Make your language inclusionary so your words, their subconscious, and what you are offering are aligned.

Here’s what I’m saying – including phrases that land in others’ subconscious mind, ones that have a short, impactful positive effect, help trigger the desire we all have to belong.  And, really, the bigger desire is to belong to something positive.

Want to go to a wedding or a funeral?

Want to go to the ball game with friends or to the dump alone?

Look, I’m pleased you stopped by…er… joined others reading this post… I couldn’t ask for more than a comment and sharing this.   I mean I’m pleased you are considering leaving a comment.   If you decide not to comment, no problem. Use the Language of Inclusion.

It’s really a pleasure reading what you and dozens of other network marketers have to say.


Mark Januszewski

The World’s Laziest Networker

Mahalo For Stopping By and Sharing
Mahalo For Stopping By and Sharing
About the Author

  • yes true, learnt this through Joe Vitale hypnotic writing, always get positive responses using it

  • When I was eating a well known fast food establishment, it took me by surprise that all the workers used “It was my pleasure” When you said “thank you”. I liked it so much that I started to use it in my everyday life. I didn’t kniow why I liked it so much until reading this!

  • I had never actually put together what you share in this post but I had noticed that in my day-to-day work as a cashier I could have a noticeable impact on people by the way I responded to them. Simply responding with Positive comments often resulted in them leaving with a smile instead of a frown. If something that simple does so much… using “inclusive” language could change EVERYTHING for Network Marketers!

  • Hey Mark,

    Insightful post, thanks for sharing…I missed the video though 🙂

    If it’s true that the words we speak create our reality (and it is), then makes perfect sense to choose a good reality.

    Very important I have found to be aware at all times of the words we are using as it’s only a slight edge for us to slip and start using disempowering language.

    Cheers Mate

  • Love it.! It has been my pleasure to open
    Mark J. treasure chest. Thank you for
    sharing. Every week I find jewels when
    I come here. I feel like the “wealthiest
    networker in the world”.

    I Believe,
    Brian H

  • This is actually funny and enjoyable simultaneously.So simple to be positive, yet we have to remind ourselves regularly because life gets in the way. Thank you, Mark, for my past due reminder

  • HI Mark, I’m new to you and your training/philosophy and I’m so happy to have been referred to you by my father. I know what you’re saying about language to be true, so it’s a wonderful reminder to pay attention to the words I choose. Thank you so much!!!

  • As always Mark, you create a canvass to fill!
    Thank you for being YOU.
    Covey also stresses the Power of Communication coming from aTrue VOICE…
    But we always remember the the Power of LISTENING to compliment the Language of Inclusion!

  • So true. The words we speak can make the difference. I have been aware of the words I use for some time and have noticed the change in my success”s more than you may realize…also keep it positive

  • Mark,

    Thanks for pointing this out. When placed side by side you can really see and feel the difference in the “Exclusionary” and Inclusionary” phrases. I will concentrate on using the Inclusionary language.

  • This is a great concept. From now on I am going to pay attention to what my words are to friends and potential customers.

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