how to get an un-supportive spouse on board

The Target

Posted a blog last week and got a couple of interesting emails.  I claimed most people are aiming at the wrong target.

The point is not sponsoring people.  The point is developing teams that can help people build effective teams without you.

The ‘confusion’ seems to be, ‘yeah, but don’t I need to get people in?’

It’s not about getting them ‘in’ …it’s about your motive and objective.

With a couple easy networking skills, it’s easy to get people in but will that hit the objective?


And, quite frankly, if ‘getting people in’ is our objective we will sponsor the absolute minimum because our motive is selfish and fear based.

Mental gut check:  Does anyone really believe they can come from a selfish, fear-based perspective and build a team of winners?  Good Grief!

And, to make things worse, we preach ‘service-driven leadership’ while focusing on sponsoring.   No wonder the few we get it quit.

Do we need to sponsor?

Yes.  But the motive better start with ‘the end in mind’ …teams that build effective teams without us.

This should help make it easy to ‘hit that spot’.


C – Consider.  Get the ‘suspect’ to consider a different outcome than the one the life they currently have is leading them too.  This is known as the Hero’s Journey….when a person moves from the life they know into a life they do not know.

C – Confirm.   Get our ‘hero’ to confirm their integrity, that they will show up.   A simple skill once you realize they don’t care about the plan, product or company.  They show up for themselves… for the hope of a different outcome.

C – Commit.  We ask our ‘hero’ to commit to telling us ‘yes’ or ‘no’ BEFORE we show them our business.   They are really committing to their life, not the ‘plan’.  I mean, really, didn’t you join for the hope of a different outcome?

C – Commence.  We close on what they want.   Go90Grow© members call this the ‘prospect’s invisible close’ and they close for you in 1 sentence.

C – Collaborate.   Now the work begins – that hands-on support.  We ‘collaborate’ with new people to help them learn what to do and what to say.

Beginning on the 13th we’ll post up 3 part video training to help you learn how to begin with the end in mind.

When you get right down to it, do you want a sponsor who is committed to sponsoring and giving you don’t quit speeches, or a sponsor who is collaborating with you, hands on, to get you that different outcome hoped for when you enrolled?

You can grab the Go90Grow© series a day earlier right here

So, what are your thoughts about the 5 C’s?

Did you join your MLM because someone wanted to get you ‘in’ or because you hoped for a different outcome?

Might it be a good idea to come from that place instead of worrying (fear) about sponsoring people into the ‘deal’?

keep giving to keep growing


mark j

world’s laziest networker

Thanks For Stopping By and Sharing
Thanks For Stopping By and Sharing


About the Author

  • Mark,

    What a total breath of fresh air when you start with the correct end in mind. Who doesn’t want another human being to take an active and sincere interest in their and their family’s future?

    Brilliance with a capital C, in fact, 5 of them!

  • Great content and very true. If you do the first 5 C correct you might add a 6:th C, Cash in 🙂

  • Mark; It is greatly appreciated that you take the time to care and help other networkers. I have been to Hawaii/Kauai many times and I can assure you I will look you up when I move to Kauai.



  • Hi Mark, Wish I had your philosophy and the skills you teach back in the 70’s when I was first introduced to Network Marketing.

    I earn a six figure income from shooting portraits but never made over $600 a year with any of the many MLM’s I have been involved with over the years.

    Thanks to your video’s I’m starting to get it… It’s not about selling others on the dream… it’s about helping them to achieve their dreams.

    Count me in the next time you open the doors again to Go90Go

  • Looking forward to seeing the three part video next week Mark. I definitely got into my deal with the end in mind but I have gotten away from this. Going to be a sponge next week for the video trainings!

  • Building teams of highly motivated distributors is the recipe for creating success in our industry. Thanks for a great video. I look forward to the 13th w/ great anticipation.

  • I want to collaborate with people to get what they want… and I will get what I want when I help enough other people get what they want. I love you guys. Can’t wait to see you on the beaches of the world!

  • Mark:

    Once again you have hit the bulls-eye. This is not about me. This is about making a difference in the lives of others. I think that people can sense this as well. This is when you build a team and develop true leadership.

    I look forward to being a part of the next Go90 class!

  • Thanks for the 5 C’s. Good stuff. Not sure what happened when we came to Kauai but we went to the Starbucks at the designated time to meet and could not find you. We were looking forward to it but oh well. Maybe another time. Thanks for all that you do to help us grow our businesses and in the process help change peoples lives in a positive way.

  • Mark, what a much more clearer insight putting it in the form of the 5 C’s. Speaking to the needs of the prospect is putting others before yourself, which in turn will bring you much more fruit. Thank you for always giving us great information to continue to build our businesses!

  • Hi Mark,

    I’m very new to all of this, having recently retired from 40 years in the Real Estate & Insurance Industry. I have been watching and learning from your “Skills” videos and I must say, your training and marketing philosophy has really gathered my interest … I think I may be ready to assemble my first team in this adventure although I am still in a state of quandary … I have no up line that has this education, so how do I really get started?

    And by the way, my retirement home is somewhere in the “Islands”, I just haven’t explored enough yet in my life to decide where it will be!

  • BAM!!

    You get it Teresa……and I love your ‘more fruit’ metaphor!

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Sorry we missed the connection……I am sure it was my error, I apoligze……coffee and dinner at Roys next trip, on us

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Aloha Claes

    And if you do the 6 Cs…’ll be sailing the 7 Seas 🙂

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Mahalo Tim

    You are spot on…’s all about teams, not enrolling people

    And clearly the mantras, ‘there is no I in Team’ ….and ….’TEAM – Together Everyone Achieves More’ …..don’t ‘build’ teams.

    Obviously you understand that…..I love it when pros like you stop by Tim, we appreciate that

    mark j

  • Aloha Steve….

    I wish I had that understanding way back then too!!

    Unfortunately, without intention, most people get ‘steered’ the wrong way…..people repeating what they were told without THINKING….and I was just as guilty until one day I looked at it from the ‘Goodyear Blimp’ vantage point…..not only was it not working but I noticed every ‘leader’ I knew was working full-time plus-plus…..there were NO PART TIME HOURS peeps making big checks.

    We decided to ‘stop the madness’ and look at real business priciples….like you are Steve.

    Thanks for taking the time to share

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Mahalo Peter…..

    The real brilliance on this entire page is wrapped up in 1 simple word….. ‘SINCERE’ ……You get it and folks that are lucky enough to work with you will understand that quickly.

    We can’t ‘see it’ if it isn’t in our consciousness and clearly you get this is not a way to ACT but to BE

    We so appreciate your visiting often and sharing, thank you Peter

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Aloha Heather…..

    There is no question you are a collaborater…..and you have a cause…..helping people understand the mold thing….and helping so many people without any expectation of resiprosity is really special.

    Thank you for all you do ***TIRELESSLY** for that ’cause’ and you have helped.

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Aloha

    Thanks for stopping by and, yes, the skills are the connector to the ‘island’ home[s] of your choice 🙂

    thanks for stopping by

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Mahalo Susan….

    It really is about building a team, hands on….teaching what to do and HOW to do it. You get it! 🙂

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Hi Claes & Mark,

    Loving your sense of humour.

    I am honoured to be your Go90Go student, Mark. I look forward to the 3-part series :)It is always great to have some practical help.

    Viola Tam – The Business Mum

  • Thank you. Yes what a breath of fresh air watching your video. Collaboration is co-workership in action and vehicle that is a win/win for everyone. Thank you.

  • Hey Mark,
    Great comments on the 5 C’s. I like the hero’s journey approach. This is similar to the work I’m do with our men work. Getting people to to transform (also called liminal space) is a challenging task. Your presentations are on target and give the right mix of lightheartedness and the wisdom of a saint. Keep up the great work. You are appreciated.

  • Mahalo Michele

    I LOVE that phrase co-workership in action…..mind if I ‘use it’ ?

    keep giving to keep growing
    mark j

  • Hi Mark,
    Wonderful news with the 5c’s, seeing I can help others achieve their dreams and in turn I achieve mine. It really is so simple, you have evolved my mind again!

  • Mahalo Ninette…..

    the cool thing is that you could not ‘get it’ [the concept] if it was not already within you!


    mark j

  • Aloha Bruce…..

    thanks for your very kind words and sharing…..obviously you’re a man on the HJ yourself…..and helping others help themselves ‘transform’ so they become transparent to the transcendent is our life’s work……your recognition of the concept makes us feel great…..

    the real challenge in MLM with the HJ is coming to a place in our beings where we realize we can’t help anyone nor change anyones life [contrary to what we are told over and over again by both leaders and companies]……once we realize this simple truth, that we really can’t help anyone, it takes pressure of everyone and we can become transparent……hopefully illuminating the path for others to learn how to help themselves…..

    see ya on the path from time to time Bruce …..appreciate another light 🙂

    mark j

  • Hey Mark, my sponser was born and raised in Hawaii. He has just reached the $5 million in commission mark in our business. Maybe you guys would like to meet?

  • I appreciate how the Five C’s is a simple, effective and loving outline/blueprint for making a difference in peoples lives.

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